RJnonymous



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    [Inside the Ottawa Centaurs’ locker room, Harris Drover attaches a microphone to Shane Hollander’s shirt as Ilya Rozanov sits next to him at a table. The two prepare to share the contents of their backpacks, which sit on the table in front of them]

    Shane: I thought when people did these interviews, they got to like, pick what’s in their bag beforehand. It’s not usually a spontaneous thing, is it?

    Ilya: How would you know this?

    Shane: I watched one that Rose did. 

    Ilya: Oh, of course you watched Rose doing one of these videos. Did she have a framed photo of you in her bag so she could gush about how much you love each other?

    Shane: Do I seriously need to remind you that I chose to marry you, and that we live and work together, and Rose is just my friend I see like twice a year?

    Ilya: Yes. 

    Shane: Are you sure you want to do this with us, Harris? 

    Harris: I can’t help that the people love you. Besides, I’ve convinced myself this will be fun. 

    Shane: That’s not very comforting. 

    Harris: Neither is the look on Ilya’s face that’s telling me I will definitely come to regret this, but that’s the job!

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    06 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya: Troy came out to the team a few days ago and then asked me for your number

    Shane: And you thought it would be a good idea to give it to him?

    Ilya: It’s been a boring few months.
    Ilya: Was he awkward? He is so awkward.
    Ilya: He is about as bad at being gay as you are.

    Shane: Fuck you.
    Shane: And YES. It was fucking awkward.

    Ilya: I knew it.
    Ilya: Tell me everything.

    Shane: He told me he was gay.
    Shane: Which WTF. Didn't see that coming.

    Ilya: Okay, yes. And?

    Shane: And then he asked me out on a date.

    Ilya: What.

    Shane: And now we’re going to dinner next week after the game.

    Ilya: WHAT.

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    05 Jul 2026

  3. Rec *

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    Ilya hadn’t known the video existed. If he had known, he would have paid someone to have it destroyed. Would have paid someone to murder Kuznetsov, maybe, just for redundancy's sake. But it was peak stupidity, to keep evidence of your homosexual perversion around in a country where that crime could get you sent to jail for several decades, and Ilya hadn’t thought that Kuznetsov would be that dumb.

    Now here Ilya was, watching a video of his fourteen-year-old self on Twitter getting fucked by his former hockey coach.

    So. There go the plans for the rest of his life.

    -

    Or: in 2018, during Ilya's last year with the Raiders, an old video is leaked on Twitter. Ilya reacts, or overreacts. Shane does, too.

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    02 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    In 2021, Shane Hollander reveals his relationship with former rival Ilya Rozanov to the shock of chronically online people worldwide, who’ve spent the last decade convincing the world he’s secretly in love with his teammate Hayden Pike

    feng (she/her) @flowerfeng · Apr 3, 2021
    gotta feel bad for shane hollander. like imagine everyone wishing you were in a secret gay relationship. and you gotta spend your career swearing you’re not in a secret gay relationship. but you ARE in a secret gay relationship. just w the wrong guy

    booboo the fool @cinnacin · Apr 4, 2021
    shane hollander w a hand on the bible: no im not in a decade-long secret relationship w fellow hockey player hayden pike
    roger cromwell: ok say it again without the hayden pike part 
    shane hollander: sweats nervously 

    (Or, imagine if #Shayden was the #LarryStylinson of the HR/GC universe)

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    02 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    rpfactorfiction

    Oh my god, I didn't know there were any copies of this left on the internet. For those who don't know, this is like. This is a foundational text of hockey RPF. This is from before hockey RPF was really a thing even. It's from the mid-aughts and wasn't posted to a fanfiction website. Instead, OP dropped this insane RPF manifesto onto a normal ass hockey fan forum (which no longer exists) then deleted their account like two days later. Just handed this to a bunch of jocks and hockey bros and dipped. Legendary shit. Like, I don't think this kid even knew what fanfiction was, the fucking hand of god just compelled him to write about being an MLH player's sex slave and show it to the world. I pray every day that this insane child actually made it to the MLH and got to meet Scott Hunter.


    So maybe Shane had a little crush on Scott Hunter in his younger years. So maybe he anonymously posted online about it once. So maybe it had become an internet legend and a running joke in the MLH.

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    01 Jul 2026